Arrested in Liverpool, Or: the Rapid Downfall of Gazza
Jesus Christ. Really, if we would have just sat down and thought about it for a second, we could have predicted this exact series of events:
1. Gazza gets tiny new job in football. He’s all clean and shiny and, apart from the fact that his wardrobe consists entirely of shirts from the 1970s, he seems to have things together.
2. Gazza appears pitchside on TV, slurring his words.
3. Gazza is fired and accused of drinking on the job.
4. Gazza gives an angry TV interview, talking about refusing to leave the club, and making threats about buying the owner out - notwithstanding the fact that he’s apparently broke.
5. Gazza drowns his sorrows in various adult beverages.
6. Gazza hits a photographer, allegedly laughing maniacally all the while.
7. Gazza lands in jail.
8. Gazza issues a tearful apology and goes to the US to get clean. Again. He promises the football world that, if he’s just given another chance, he’ll make everyone proud.
Granted, steps #5 and #8 are pure speculation, but I’m feeling pretty confident in both of them. You know what I said yesterday, about the sympathy of a nation running out? Yeah, this is definitely it. Poor man. At least normal people are allowed to fall apart in private - legends don’t get to do that.
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